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Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Obfuscation: Murtech's Website

No doubt you will be as shocked as I was to learn a company owned by the nephew of Congressman John P. Murtha, called Murtech, is receiving no-bid government contracts yet doesn't seem to be doing much, according to the Washington Post reporter who visited the place. Determing what the company is even supposed to do is difficult and you won't get much help on that or anything else from what could be the Murtech website, all two pages of it.

You won't find on the Murtech website, for example, an address or phone number, nor the names of principals and other employees. It is, therefore, not an absolute certainty, I suppose, that this Murtech website is actually connected to the Murtech firm owned by the congressman's nephew, but gosh, you have to wonder.

One thing you will find, in spades, is gobbledygook, such as I have rarely seen before. For those in search of, for example, "Logistics Support," the website claims Murtech
Provides full range of logistics support to perform supply and logistics support at all organizational levels, provisioning and supply support. Specific support focuses on logistics support analysis (LSA), ILS planning and program implementation, inventory control, project management, shipping and handling coordination, and specialized facility requirements, warehouse management, and status reporting, tracking, facilities management, supply chain project/program plans and reports, and security support.
Okie, dokie, it looks as if they run a self-storage outfit; and what can you expect should you be in dire need of "Acquisition Support?" Have no fear, those good folks at Murtech will
[Provide] program management, analytical, engineering and technical services in support of Acquisition and Life Cycle mission functions. Specific support includes the acquisition and life cycle management functions, which are derived from the analysis of the program requirements and objections. Murtech utilizes a structured process that enables tracking of individual requirements and development planning and budgeting support documentation that is essential for program support. By integrating the system engineering design requirements, development schedules, test and evaluation results, ILSP requirements, training functions and manufacturing schedule, Murtech is able to provide detailed acquisition support documentation for the planning and budgeting cycles to ensure that the program remains on track with cost, schedule, and performance.
Got that? I hope you're taking notes.

Only once before have I encountered such inpenetrable jargon. It came from the lips of a former acquaintance who claimed to be the founder, owner and manager of an investment firm. He would use argot like the above when describing his work and those of us subjected to it would find ourselves scratching our heads, trying to figure out just what it was our friend did. The answer (not surprisingly) turned out to be nothing, the fellow was a fraud; he had no business and whatever income he enjoyed resulted from his embezzling from an an organization to which we both belonged. Any parallels, you think?

(h/t Instapundit.)

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