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Friday, June 01, 2007

The Episcopal Church: For Dudes Only

Chris Johnson of MCJ, employing his usual deft touch, regales us with some of the more unhinged reactions from the usual suspects following +Cantuar's decision not to invite Gene Robinson to the next Lambeth Conference. I won't steal his thunder, you should read it all, but the following cherce example, from the pen of the Rev'd Nigel Taber-Hamilton nicely illustrates the prevailing mood of the moonbats these days.

If, therefore, we continue to tolerate those who are uninterested in conversation, mutual acceptance, and radical inclusion, then we place our own necks on Mme. Guillotine’s block and hand our opponents the executioner’s cord. These neo-Puritans are focusing intently on the destruction of tolerance’s foundational values. Our demise would result in the success of their narrow and puritanical agenda within the broader Church, and herald a similar victory over the open society of our North American culture

says the the Rev'd Taber-Hamilton, mildly.

Rev'd Sir, Rev'd Sir: Cheer up and dry those tears, I have good news for you! Those blue(nose) meanies in the Church that have all you dudes so worked up into a lather have asked me to pass on a message: they hear you and they're leaving! Soon you'll have the whole Church to yourselves, with NO FASCISTS ALLOWED! Think of it: you can play Twister in the Sanctuary and Dungeons and Dragons on the altar; you can play "Chopsticks," "Heart and Soul" and King Crimson on the organ, over and over again; no one will stop you! You can put weed in the censer and Boones Farm in the chalice--whatever turns you on, call it the Holy Spirit!

Of course, you can play any religion you like, too: Shamanism, Buddhism, Zoroastrianism, Wicca, Islam, you name it; you can even mix and match. You can have all kinds of neat weddings: nuptials for pets, parents marrying their kids (or vice versa!), brothers marrying brothers--or sisters, or both! It's all up to you and it's all yours, have a ball! The hostile dudes have promised to stay away and promise not to harsh your mellow ever again. Of course, you're gonna have some bills to pay and you might want to start making plans for the all-important bake sale to raise revenue. May I suggest hash brownies?

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